hoisted from the archives: the complete ex-fansubber hitorigoto coverage of zero no tsukaima season two

(This season: KISSING! KYAAAAAAAAAH! -jpmeyer)

Zero no Tsukaima II – 01 (originally posted on 07/09/2007)

Louise, flat chests turn me on. Let's do it during the opening credits.

So we’re back with another fun tsundere packed season of Zero no Tsukaima. Although unless you’ve been under a rock, the obvious reason this whole story was created was (besides the continuation of the novel) to show how big of a horndog Saito is, and that Louise is now showing more dere dere than usual. I honestly think I like the current Louise more and based on the opening theme I get the feeling I’m gonna enjoy any and all the cute Louise x Saito moments. And of course I will be sure to cover every single one of them in my posts

I squeeled.

I danced around my computer desk.

I rooted for the ball game.

Come on Louise, just a little lower.

I groaned. =_=;

So while Louise rages of jealousy are back, I’m glad to see more of her dere dere side come out because Saito needs some lovin (and some spankin’ for trying to be a manho.)

Upcoming Attractions: Henrietta gets herself some man ass.

Zero no Tsukaima II – 02 (originally posted on 07/15/2007)

See I told you Henrietta gets ass!! But nobody believed me. I never said it had to be non-zombie ass but anyway. I guess they used magic to revive him back to life but as an evil zombie! I mean who ever gets revived to be GOOD? It’s like in that movie My Boyfriend’s Back. All he did was eat people! So anyway he tells her to “Come with him” and then recites their “promise” from 3 years ago. She promptly falls for it and that’s when Saito & Louise hear about her kidnapping.

So eventually after catching up to the princess (with the help of Kirsche and Tabitha), Louise and Saito attempt to stop him from taking her away. Unfortunately she only sees him in her eyes and nothing else so she blindly uses her magic against Saito as well. Eventually Saito manages to hold off a massive hurricane produced by the two of them, while Louise chants a spell breaker…which for some reason rather than breaking a spell totally fries Wales. He then appears to return to his normal form while asking Henrietta to make a promise to “forget about him” and after more crying ensues, he dies for the 2nd time.

Boy that was shortlived.

Upcoming Attractions: Looks like more rivalry between Louise & Siesta.

Zero no Tsukaima II – 03 (originally posted on 07/22/2007)

Bah! The preview of last week was misleading! There was only like 2 seconds of Siesta combined with a boob joke. W/e. >_> So anyway this week focuses on a character with a parodied name and background – Julius Ceasar of “Romaria” harrrrr (x1000). So it seems all the boys at school are getting drafted into the army because of the war. All the girls are crying and weeping with their boyfriends, until of course Julius shows up and swoons them all. As typical, he has interest in only Louise, which makes Kirsche jealous, pisses Saito off and creates a step ladder for more predictability to come.

He challenges Saito to a battle for “Louise’s kiss”. Saito realizes that his only power comes from that seal on his hand, so he doesn’t actually have any swordsman battle skills. He asks that mage hating lady to help him train. As usual JC Staff puts in the “Louise shows up at the wrong time” joke and gets pissed off and blows Saito to pieces. When the next day Saito is ready for battle, Momo actually cheers him on because she doesn’t want Julius to kiss Louise.

Julius purposely loses the fight and Saito realizes this. He gets pissed off and walks away, despite Louise saying that it’s okay for him to kiss her. Wow so like in season 2, Louise is all like deredere with him, but he has to be a dick about everything now. It’s like they were totally reversed. When he wanted her in S. 1 she was all too tsuntsun, now she’s all dere dere and he’d rather have a harem. Bah! So then it turns out Julius is an ally hired by Henrietta and she asks them to cooperate with him. As usual he kisses Louise’s hand, pisses Saito off etc.

Upcoming Attractions: Boobfest – Louise’s onee-samatachi come over to play. =_=;

Zero no Tsukaima II – 04 (originally posted on 07/29/2007)

"OH SHIT I JUST TOLD LOUISE I LOVE HER!" There's hope for this show after all!

ROCK THE BOAT GUYS! Wow what a steamy episode xDDD Well it satisfied 200% my inner Louise x Saito fangirl despite the fact that there was a disgusting Louise x Siesta makeout/boob grab scene. JP told me the novels are smutty like this; too bad my kanji sucks and I wouldn’t be able to figure out where the smut is anyway XD. But anyway as usual I bring you the breakdown play by play!

"Alright you can touch ONE body part...(but please do more)"

"SCORE!!!"

I started getting School Days flashbacks

"Damn Saito! I mean...keep going!"

It's getting hot in here (ho!) so take off all your clothes! etc

. . . .

owned.

So while I’m glad Saito finally decided to hit that, it seems like it involved Louise’s family pushing her to get married..except of course the nice big-boobed oneesama…who ironically was not the one Inoue Kikuo was voicing. I dunno why Siesta is all of a sudden “I’m gonna take Saito from you Miss Varielle! (SP?)” but it’s annoying. I hate you Siesta. I hate all the women in this show who make Saito stray.

Upcoming Attractions: Something about Louise’s sisters being accused of stealing? I just saw someone’s shirt being ripped off with boobs exposed o_O;

Zero no Tsukaima II – 05 (originally posted on 08/05/2007)

Yay 600 posts! So this week seems more like a story based episode. Seems like the “criminal” with the boob mark was amongst the good guys! Also Julius’ “The girls willingly showed me their breasts” comment made me laugh ;D. As far as Louise x Saito go….too much Saito abuse this week. It gave me vibes of season 1 all over again and how freaking tsuntsun Louise was. God she even bought a whip you probably use in some sort of S&M play ^^;;;;;;; I also realized that when Saito discovered that Louise’s blonde sister is flat, the blonde basically represents Season 1 Louise, while the pink hair big boob neesama represents a little of Season 2 Louise. Well here’s to seeing more of Season 2 Louise, cause the tsuntsun sucks!! D:< It's only good if it happened in School Days with Makoto (he should be beaten with 3 of those whips.)

P.S. Siesta is just being a god damn whore now.

Upcoming Attractions: Oh great. Saito gets it on with Henrietta next week.

Zero no Tsukaima II – 06 (originally posted on 08/12/2007)

I’m glad that there was a good chunk of storyline but Henrietta’s whoreness made me roll my eyes numerous times. JP told me in the novel she keeps trying to screw Saito but at the last minute he chickens out or something. Until this episode I had no idea Henrietta had a huge rack. I mean I forgot if I was watching Zero no Tsukaima or Onegai Henrietta. Also wtf is with the constantly Louise makeout scenes? Is she supposed to make out with every man or woman in this show? Next thing we’ll see Julius kissing her and probably Henrietta will join that bandwagon too. Ugh, do not want. Next plz.

Upcoming Attractions: Siesta in a high school uniform. Do not want. Next…please dear god please no more of this! T_T

Zero no Tsukaima II – 07 (originally posted on 08/19/2007)

Really, I wish this woulda happened instead.

So JP told me that in Harry Potter, there’s a hidden door in the girl’s bathroom too. My eyes did a 360 roll to the back of my head. Also is Saito hanging out with Makoto lately? Cause Saito’s hormone levels are at an all time peak this season. Unfortunately for Saito, he gets punished, while Makoto gets away with it. Also Agnes is a bulldyke. Lol. She fit the look/act pretty well but this about confirmed it.

Zero no Tsukaima II – 10 (originally posted on 09/09/2007)

Wow ZnT has become serious business. So as you can tell the only scene that I enjoyed in this episode is when they were stuck in the ice dome. Just as I predicted on cue “now she’s gonna strip” and so she did lol. The rest of the episode felt fillariciously retarded especially when they introduce a 1 ep. character who you will never see again. I don’t even know/nor was I paying attention on what the hell their actual mission was…nor did it matter anyway. The last few weeks it was all seriousness and fighting and not as fanservicey. I’m all good with that but when it’s completely random and thrown in like this week…I think I’d rather see Saito-and-his-harem episodes instead.

Upcoming Attractions: Beats me, the preview inhaled deeply.

Zero no Tsukaima II – 11 (originally posted on 09/16/2007)

wut

You know it’s pretty obvious the only plot left for this show is “I’m royalty therefore I’d rather die with pride than live as a coward” bullshit. Along with that is Saito and Louise’s “different” ideals on this matter in order to create a conflict so that in the end the two of them can kiss and make up (and by that I mean furiously do it.) The bunny and cat outfits on Louise and Siesta were funny (and eye rolling) but felt out of place when in the end everyone was fighting everyone else. I was like wtf zombies now?_? Also Siesta being random and (almost) raping Saito was like….wut? Also giving Julius some “importance” in this episode felt random too. I just feel like because the series is coming to an end they’re throwing everything in like a pot of nabe

Upcoming Attractions: Louise & Saito get married Romeo & Juliet style, then Saito dies or something. (NO he probably won’t really die)

Boob no Tsukaima II – 12 (Finale) (originally posted on 09/16/2007)

I'll just pretend the episode ended here.

You know they COULDA made this all emotional and sweet and shit…but NO. They had to ruin it by focusing on the one thing this whole series was about: BIG BOOBS. Yes Saito was saved by the fucking BOOB fairy which pissed Louise off once again and they even added a recycled pan shot of Siesta’s huge rack for kicks & giggles. Also the whole point of Saito fighting that whole army? Wut? Deus ex Machina anyone? Wow that was dumb. If there’s a sequel to this I don’t think I wanna bother watching it. It’s so irritating when they try to combine fanservice & story because it makes no fucking sense and in the end the one thing we all waited for 2 seasons (well at least I did) is for Louise to get over her tsundereass and Saito to stop chasing after melons. But no. For all it matters you coulda watched episodes 1, 2, 3, 4 and 12 and missed absolutely nothing.

P.S. Nice Boat.

(“If there’s a sequel to this I don’t think I wanna bother watching it.”—but despite that, we’ve got season 3 tomorrow. And season three means one, er two things: SACKS OF LACTATING FAT. -jpmeyer)

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