the “best” anime of 2011

THE “AWARDS” WHERE I JUST MAKE FUN OF STUFF:

“Best” DUDE YOU HAVE TO CHECK OUT THIS AMAZING ‘JAPANIMATION’! IT’S NOT KID’S STUFF LIKE DISNEY CARTOONS!: those terrible Marvel anime

Seriously, Tiger and Bunny did everything that these wanted to do a million times better.

My comments are in green. (Hinano)

Best/”best” Engrish and most appropriate/inappropriate Norio Wakamoto role: Uta no Prince-sama

I actually timed him one time and he rolled the R in one of his words for 8 whole seconds. Seriously, watch a timer while you do that. It feels like it never ends!

Best sidekick: Penguin #1

#2 sits around farting the whole time and #3 will only help you to make dinner. #1 will get you tons of porn and take upskirt photos for you.

But hey at least #2 could warm up a meat bun in his butt for you!

Best filler episode and best/”best” English: Ika Musume

Eat a duck I must? Seriously though, I wish more anime would bring in native speakers when they need to have a white character speak English rather than leaving it up to that character’s Japanese VA.

This was actually the only Ika Musume episode I’ll ever watch.

“Best”/breast filler episode(s): Seikon no Qwaser S2

Man, the second half of this show, when it turned into a bunch of standalone comedy vignettes, was seriously one of the better comedies this year.

“Best” joke about a TMA-esque porno version of Touch: Onii-chan no Koto Nanka Zenzen Suki Ja Nain Dakara ne!!

Also, cocks.

The Manos: The Hands of Fate Memorial Award for excellence in the field of titular redundancy: IS: Infinite Stratos

This name isn’t even THAT silly, which is a good thing! The sillier trend this year where those overly long titles that require an abbreviation coughAnoHanacoughMoshiDoracough.

“Best” manservice and The Rosario + Vampire Memorial Award for the “best” anime to watch on Nico Nico: The Bridge to the Starry Sky

Despite being an eroge adaptation, there could very well be more nude scenes of the shota little brother than there are of the girls.

Sooooooo not gay. Riiiiiiiiiiight.

Best/”best”/breast trap: Sasha

In the first half of Qwaser, Sasha has to infiltrate the bitchiest sorority at an exclusive all-girls school. There’s also some business involved with fighting people in virtual reality, which gives us a perfect opportunity to show him with actual tits.

(Honorable mention: Ringo-sensei.)

Best/”best”/breast reverse trap: Charlotte

“Best” because she was easily the most likeable character on the show. “‘Best’” and “breast” because honestly, who does she think she is fooling?

Best implied yaoi scene in a non-yaoi series: Every single scene featuring Flit

I was only able to watch a few episodes of Gundam AGE because honestly, Flit looks far more at home in some Inazuma 11 rape doujin than in a Gundam series.

Finest cats: Kimi to Boku.

Yeah, dropped this one maybe halfway through the first episode.

No homo. Wait, yes homo.

The Sora no Woto Memorial Award for “excellence” in the field of awkward transliterations: Gosick

I really just want to pronounce this as “gothic” and be done with it. Oh and also, honorable mention: Haganai

“Best” conflation of violence and sexuality: Itsuka Tenma no Kuro Usagi

Not only does it constantly equate fighting with fucking, they even toss in the ol’ cliche of female characters being evil because they are sexual and sexual because they are evil.

“Best” remake of Evangelion: Soft Tennis

I remember exactly two things about this show: cows and Eva.

Best semen eating motiff: Koe de Oshigoto

I’ve got a feeling that this award isn’t going anywhere for a while. That said, Lotte no Omocha gave it a scare for a moment!

Why am I still watching this?

Most necessary tie-in: The Breast Omelet

Fap?

Biggest cradle robber: Meme Touwa

(Honorable mention: Mitsutoshi Shimabukuro lololololololol)

Most unnecessary spinoff: Kimi to Boku.

They didn’t need to genderswap K-On. It already has a fairly sizeable female fanbase.

Here’s hoping that the Daily Lives of High School Boys will actually be boys doing BOY things, rather than GIRL things.

The Straight Cougar Memorial Award for most ridiculous Sunrise character name: Full Frontal

Horizon has some pretty absurd names (Horizon Ariadust, Toussaint Neshinbara, Tenzo Crossunite, etc.) but I’m disqualifying it because it’s not a Sunrise original production.

Side note: it’s weird watching English dubs of Gundam series because you’ll constantly hear the characters inserting random English words into their sentences that don’t make any sense until you realize that that word is actually someone’s name.

Most ridiculous non-Sunrise name: Kurenai Gekkou

Look, I’m fine with works that have theme names for their characters whether they’re names like “Remus Lupin” or “Naruto Uzumaki.” But the names in Itsuka Tenma no Kuro Usagi go way, way too far on the chuunibyou scale. They are pretty much the Japanese equivalent of saying “SHUT UP MOM! MY NAME ISN’T STEVE! IT’S BLÖÖDRAVEN DARKCHYLDE!”

I still think CROSSFIRE YUUICHI, KURENAI HINATA and KUROGANE TIGHT are just as awesome.

Most ridiculous non-Sunrise name, animal division: Kuppuru

In case you don’t understand why this name is ridiculous, I’ll translate the scene where he gets his name into an English equivalent: “Ooh Mr. Kitty, your fur is so black and fluffy, so I’ll name you ‘Blfluffy!’” “Blfluffy” sounds more like the name of a Lovecraftian elder god than the name of a cat (whose fur is so black and fluffy.)

Funny enough, the game actually never explained why the fuck she called him Kuppuru. So uh thanks A1?

Most ridiculous non-Sunrise name, butthole division: Anaru

Based on what AnoHana was originally intended to be, I guess it makes sense that the two main female characters are essentially named “Anal” and “Oral”.

(Also, “Popo?” Moar liek “Poopoo” amirite?)

FANSERVICE:

Worst censorship: Manyuu Hikenchou

Uh, what is happening here?

Most annoying fanservice trend: bellybuttons

Man, I hope that I never need to watch another video again on Nico Nico where the screen is filled with peropero-s

“Best” source material: Persona 4

You like Persona because you like BALLS!

Every single other conceivable fanservice award: Seikon no Qwaser S2

Man, if I hadn’t known any better I wouldn’t have thought it possible for them to top season one. Whoops! Perhaps the zenith of this series is Katya walking around with a tengu mask tied to her crotch, which she uses the oversized nose of which to poke Tomo in her gigantic novelty boobs.

BAD:

The Gundam Seed Destiny Memorial Award for the series that could’ve been best improved if I had written it: Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magica

Madoka needed a few tweaks and it could’ve been what it had the potential to be. #1, rely less on torture porn; #2, actually animate things (there was one scene where they used exactly 3 shots for something like 10 minutes); #3, seriously cut down on the tl;dr.

This should also be a shoe-in for most overrated ripoff cause seriously it’s like Evangelion with lolis instead of robots. Sometimes I think it only gained popularity because of the coincidental events with the Japan March earthquake.

Guiltiest pleasure: Uta no Prince-sama

I think my “like” towards this show is best summed up by an early episode where the titular Prince-samas that uta are practicing a dance routine. The dance is SO TERRIBLE (the animation is also extremely choppy) that I naturally laughed at it since I assumed that it was a joke. Except that once we cut back to Haruka and instead of saying “Alright, let’s keep working on this”, she instead says “WOW THAT WAS THE MOST AMAZING DANCE EVER!!!!!!111one”

(Also, note that in the clip above they all perform the long version of the ending song. Rather than display the credits over this as the show ends, this scene is then followed by the standard credit sequence, which repeats both the song and much of the dance. Unfortunately I can’t link to that because all the videos of the ED on Youtube have gotten C&Ded.)

I love Uta no Prince-sama…the game. The anime is just 13 episodes of gay until Saotome tells them to stop buttsecksing and make a fucking song. If you aren’t sure whether or not to pick it up, maybe my video will help make up your mind.

Worst OP: Denpa Onna to Seishun Otoko

Worst ED: Wolverine

Most surprisingly bad series: Guilty Crown

Uhhhhhhhn, use me, Shu!

Most surprisingly “bad” series: Hanasaku Iroha

I mean, it wasn’t comically inept and quite frankly, it had some really stunning production values. But if I wanted to watch a conservative rural propaganda dorama, I’d check out what’s airing on the NHK this season. (Spoiler warning: I don’t.)

QUALITY-est animation: Toriko

Biggest sequel dropoff and worst shoujo series: Kimi ni Todoke s2

Kyaaaah, nothing happening! That’s almost as good as implied commitment! ｡ﾟ:;｡+ﾟ☆(///ω///)★ﾟ+｡::ﾟ｡:.ﾟ｡

I gave up on the manga as well, don’t even know if it went anywhere. I heard it did but lol yea whatever, let’s get some ACTION here.

This year’s “ZOMG ANIME IS DYING” award: Lotte no Omocha

OMG THAT IS A LOLI THAT NEEDS TO DRINK SEMEN.

MayoChiki could also be on this list, along with every other template shitty light novel adaptation.

Worst visual novel adaptation: Starry Sky

Look, it’s just not possible to compress four complete games into a handful of short webisodes.

This series is so overrated that they know they can produce shit and fangirls will buy it anyway. Just as keikaku. Studio DEEN will proceed to ruin more Otome Game adaptations next year with Hiiro no Kakera!

Worst shounen series: Toriko

How can this show possibly be real? I can’t even imagine the pitch for it. It’s easy to imagine the pitch for something like say, One Piece, Naruto or Bleach. “How about this one for a manga: a boy with an evil spirit sealed inside him wants to become the head of his ninja clan?” That sounds totally legit. “Uh boss, we got this manuscript in from some convicted sex offender. It’s about this guy that punches hams. Let’s run with it.” Not so much.

Worst “action”: Horizon in the Middle of Nowhere

If you have so much info to dump that you need to have a voiceover during the credits to even remotely scratch the surface of the background of your setting, you need to spend less time on TV Tropes and more time with an editor.

Worst mecha: Gundam AGE

Or maybe this is a bit harsh, seeing how it’s a kiddie show.

Worst OVA: Baby Princess

I will admit one thing: as terrible as this was, it is not even REMOTELY as bad as Sister Princess.

Worst fanservice: Rio Rainbow Gate

Everything that happens in this show is so incomprehensively strange that it can show a scene of busty girls in tiny bathing suits playing volleyball and the first thing that pops into my head is “Why are there geometry equations flying around all over?”

Worst “comedy”: Level E

YELLING INCREASINGLY LOUDLY DOES NOT COUNT AS COMEDY. Sigh, why do I have to keep repeating myself?

Chuunibyou-iest anime and worst anime of the year: Ituska Tenma no Kuro Usagi

Surprisingly, this was not a category until this year. So let’s see: SECRET POWERS, stupid names, conflating fighting and fucking, DARK DEMONIC CREATURES, man what DOESN’T this show have? But that’s just the chuunibyou part. To push it over the top as the worst anime of the year, you have to understand that this show is incompetant in the kind of ways that most people take for granted. I’m talking about things like characters suddenly appearing in the show to explain something or move the story forward and then vanishing just as suddenly. I mean seriously, you guys couldn’t figure out a way to tell us this without having a literal exposition fairy? And possibly even worse than that are characters that suddenly appear and then vanish for no narrative purpose whatsoever. Or that the pacing is so bad the every

GOOD:

Best OP: The Idolm@ster

Won’t lie, I only included this for “Are you ready? I’m LADY!”

The real best OP wtf is this Idolm@aster shit grrrrrrrr: Sexual Education for 30 Year Olds

Best ED and best soundtrack: That chiptune version of the Mawaru Penguindrum ED

Bonus: that chiptune version of Rock Over Japan.

Most surprisingly good/”good”/shitty series: Yondemasu yo, Azazel-san

I kusowarota’ed at this show wayyyyyyyy harder than at any other show this year. Oh, and emphasis on “kuso”.

Best sequel and The IT’S OK IF I’M THE DEVIL Memorial Award for excellence in the field of AWESOMENESS: Kaiji S2

Maaaaaaaaaan, the ownage in this season. This season was so good at getting me pumped up at anticipating Kaiji to own someone that I invariably would end up running over to the manga and spoiling the entire rest of that storyline because I just couldn’t wait any more.

Best/”best” visual novel adaptation: Uta no Prince-sama

Best because I was thoroughly entertained. “Best” because most of the reason for said entertainment was because they actually did a pretty terrible job adapting it.

Best shounen: Chihayafuru

Wait, you mean the card battle show starring a youthful protagonist who wants to be the best in the world/Japan actually originated in Be-Love? Fuck.

(THE HEART OF THE CARDS! lololololol)

Best mecha: Gundam Unicorn

::checks calendar:: Whew, don’t have to think again this year either. That said, unfortunately Gundam Unicorn didn’t also repeat this year in the category of “best” anime featuring a scene of a female character blushing at the thought of eating a hot dog.

Best comedy: Sexual Education for 30 Year Olds

PS: The censoring is a joke because you’re not supposed to be taking the lessons seriously.

“Best” Comedy: Ben-To

Ben-To is weird. The cast does a great job, it’s got all of mankind’s desires, and it has some episodes (like the pool one—lolololololololol “Hyoketsu no Majo” indeed) that are consistently hilarious, and then there are ones where there’s too much violence or overwrought mythology that serve as a form of anti-humor.

Best something, if I had a category that I could easily give it an award for: Bunny Drop

Well, it can’t win best comedy, and I feel bad leaving it out, so like with Tatami Galaxy last year, I’ll just make up something for it.

(And whew, good thing that the anime ended before this series gets really creepy!)

Best anime, if the year was 2000 and not 2011: Dog Days

I mean seriously, the cast list alone is enough to make it a dead ringer for the zillion shows I was forced to watch!

Best anime: Mawaru Penguindrum

Alright, I’ll freely admit it: around the time when Yuri sprouted a dick it became clear that there was nobody driving this bus. Even so, there was still nothing that entertained me even remotely as much as this show.

And now, your favorite part of your favorite post of the year:

Analhana
Bukakeman
Beelzebutt
[C]men
Faptale
IS: Infinite Strapons (over nine thousand penises?)
Itsuka Tenma no Kuso Usagi
Maji de Koi ni Shit-nasai
Manpoo Hikenchou
Mawaru Penisdrum
No. 2
Poosona 4
Poo Exorcist (The power of Christ compels you…to poo!)
Pure Shite Symphony
Scat Dance
Soft Penis
Twin Angels: Tinkle Parade
Tiger and Buttsex
Un-Ko
Wang-aria!
Youmaypoopy Merry

Finally, this was my favorite anime-related anything this year notclose, and this was my second-favorite anime-related anything this year notclose.

Also, this is blogging anniversary #6.